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Double E6

by James Motz

Peralta sees the hardball skip
Sees the speedy runner tip
To slide for second, flips
The ball to force … no? Oh sh**!
How’s he safe? Man, better get
Ready for the next man’s hit
Campana’s fast, let it rip!
Bang bang out! No?! Frick!
Umps call safe – here’s the Skip
Doesn’t matter, Cubs are slick
And set for win. Jhonny spits
his disgust. Tomorrow …

… he will hit

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Expert Color Commentary Prediction Haiku

by John Shea

BALTIMORE ORIOLES

“They might break even
if the young pitching improves.”
We’ve heard this before.

BOSTON RED SOX

After a tough loss
the new manager searches
for false-nose glasses

SEATTLE MARINERS

Jesus can create
a feast from loaves and fishes,
but Jesus can’t catch.

PHILADELPHIA PHILLIES

With steroids now banned
normal aging will resume.
The cliff draws near.

DETROIT TIGERS

Trying to play third
when first base is a stretch could
drive a man to drink.

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2012 AL Central Prediction Haiku

By Stuart Shea

CHICAGO WHITE SOX
With the mouth gone to
Sunnier climes, will the Sox
Be hung out to dry?

CLEVELAND INDIANS
“Is Grady injured?”
“Was there a Tuesday last week?”
Michael Brantley’s glad.

DETROIT TIGERS
27 games
Before Brandon Inge returns
To reclaim third base.

KANSAS CITY ROYALS
Those young hitters can’t
Overpower the smell of
Five pieces of meat.

MINNESOTA TWINS
Such a nice ballpark
And such nice people watching
Their nice, boring team.