Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
Big Klu and his guns struck fear
Into opponents both far and near.
His sleeves were ripped out, swung the bat with great clout,
The Mighty Big Klu was he.
His biceps were frightening, indeed.
He caused the old hardball to bleed.
No doubt he was big, he also was tough,
The Mighty Big Klu was he.
His muscles were au naturel,
Unlike DeRosa and Sosa, et al.
No steroids or juice, just nature unloosed–
The Mighty Big Klu was he!
Posted 8/21/2007
By Stu Shea
Sox lose,
More blues.
‘pen sucks,
Big bucks.
Old team,
Fans scream.
Fire Ken,
Start again.
Oz stays,
He’s crazed.
One way that this year’s Verlander-ing
Was different than classic philandering:
Pudge set it up with his pandering,
Aided by expert ball-handling,
But after all their energy-expending,
The Brewers had blue balls at the ending.
Goose Gossage,
Goose Gossage,
You are your own Bossage,
You have your own mitt that you sign and Embossage.
Goose Gossage,
Goose Gossage,
You always will Flossage,
Your round rolling stone will ne’er gather no Mossage.
Goose Gossage,
Goose Gossage,
You boot up with DOSsage,
You always predict the results of coin Tossage.
Goose Gossage,
Goose Gossage,
Your car drives with Nossage,
And you play like you dance, like the winged Bob Fossage.
(Sandy’s site, with his comedy teammates: Schadenfreude.net)
Posted 8/3/07
by Nate
There once was a team from Kansas City
That other fans always seemed to pity.
“They show up some nights.”
And mostly they’re right.
About Sluggerr they think, “Just a kitty.”
But MY Royals and theirs aren’t the same.
I live and die with every game.
My boys always fight,
And light up the night.
Of my Royals I am not ashamed.
Things will be different next year.
A winning season is oh so near.
To crops, they’re the cream.
And it won’t be a dream
To toast a championship with a beer!
Posted 7/26/07