New Words

by Jim Daniels

Saturday afternoon, alone in the living room
I crouched on the floor to watch
the Tigers lose another game.

Don Wert let a ball roll through
his legs and down the line in left.
You pimp, I cried
as the winning run scored.

My mother dropped laundry, grabbed my arm:
what’d you call him?
Pimp, I mumbled. I was nine
and about to learn a new word.

My mother turned off the tv.
A man sells a woman’s body.
I thought about that for a long time:

Don Wert missed a ground ball.
Don Wert did not sell women’s bodies.
Don Wert was not a good third baseman.
Don Wert was not a pimp.

It would be a couple more years
before I thought much about women’s bodies
before I etched a g for girls
into my dresser drawer knob I used
to dial in my dreams.

That night I pinned Don Wert’s baseball card
to my dartboard and took my pleasure.
Pimp, I whispered, pimp.

Jim Daniels is the Thomas Stockham Baker Professor of English at Carnegie Mellon University, where he has taught creative writing for 30 years.

Is Adam Dunn?

By Stuart Shea

Is Adam Dunn?

Can he cure the hole-in-the-bat, don’t-know-where-the-hits-are-at, can’t-believe-they-signed-him-for-that blues?

More than likely he’s in a slump,
More than likely he’ll break out of this dump,

But maybe not until he winds up back in the league-where-the-pitches-more-often-are-fat.

A Whimper, Not a Bang

by Hilary Barta

The Cubs and the Sox have done battle
The fans cheered their ‘siders like cattle
.     But the final at bat
.     Felt tiny and flat,
As A.J. gave up the death rattle

Of course you know, Hilary Barta is a world-class illustrator and pens limericks every day over at LimerWrecks, right?  C’mon, get your head out of the sand.

Bradbury-ed in the Standings

by Jim Siergey

From Ozzie, this buzz—
“If my ‘firemen’
give up one more iffy run,
I’ll know it’s because
they’ve been reading
Farenheit 451.”

.

 

Various Action of 6-21

by Ember Nickel

Paul
Hit a ball
Out for his fifth straight day. No Sox
Bat has got six straight days of park-vacating knocks.

Mitch
Also hit a ball out, which
Put things such that his squad won.
No outs–not a pitch (bar 10 and a half prior innings’ worth)–prior to winning run.

Zack
Didn’t lack
For Ks,
Notching 10 against Rays.

Ryan Howard
Is not a coward.
His hit wound up a big inning
So his squad wound up winning.

Brian
Had to start pitching, as Placido and Ryan
Both got hit by a pitch
On back-to-back plays, that inning. At that point, you must switch.

Carl Pavano
Had to go mano-a-mano
With his opposing moundsman. Carl didn’t notch a hit
But as his squad had 8 in as many at-bats, was cool with it.

Justin Smoak
Was part of a ninth-inning croak.
His squad was up by four
But couldn’t shut Washington’s door.

Ember Nickel blogs at Lipogram! Scorecard!