Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
Been an Astro for so long,
Got the gong,
Here’s your song:
Bye, bye, Berkman.
Master of the hard line drive,
You’re 35?
What’s that jive?
Bye, bye, Berkman.
When Ed Wade shipped your contract to the Yankees last July,
You didn’t know it wasn’t “come on back,” but just “goodbye.”
The hourglass is losing sand.
Will you land
In Japan?
Bye, bye, Berkman.
by Cormican
In the euphoria of the NLCS, this Phillies fan contemplated a pitching duel for the ages and channeled the spirit of Edgar Allan Poe for this poem. Alas, the matchup wasn’t meant to be, which adds the appropriate amount of heartbreak to this homage to Poe.
It was many and many a month ago
.  In a ballpark in NYC
That an Ace there pitched so nonchalant
.  That caught pop-ups non-chalantly
He was an ace and Doc was an Ace
. at this ballpark in South Philly
Dare we dream of a game that is more than a game
. One with Halladay – Lee
With an arm that the horned demons in Bronx
. Coveted Clifton P. Lee
And this was the reason that, months ago
. In this ballpark in South Philly
A smug came out, refurbished the farm
. by trading our Clifton P. Lee
So that our deep pocket neighbors can
. can sign him from SEA
To set him up with Sabbathia
. In their kingdom in NYC
The Rangers, not half as blessed with pitching
. Went trading with SEA for Lee
Yes, this was the season (as old men know,
. for the team that was once from DC)
That the Doc came out of a cold north town
. Starting and stopping their Clifton P. Lee
But their team it was far stronger than the teams
. Of those with Chocolate Chili
. Of those with Jerry Garci…
And neither the Angels in Los Angeles/Anaheim
. Or the demons in Bronx, NYC
Can ever dissever Game one from Game one
. ‘gainst Rangers,’gainst Yankees
For when a game starts, the players start winning my heart
. Especially Halladay – Lee
Other stars will rise, but none, in my eyes
. match the aces that this night I see
And so as the sun died, I sat down on my hide
With my Yuengling – my Riesling – my team and my bride
. See the stadium in South Philly
. In the glory of Halladay – Lee.
Found on the Phillies blog, The Good Phight.
Alas-alack
Pinstripes not back?
Some would gloat
(I won’t argue or disagree)
(Girardi’s mystery-management
Of over-paid players not his fault
Management its money awkward
A mad hatter no one asked for)
Texas deserved & closed the deal
The Yankees are too old for now
& should think “tomorrow “
by David Bellel
What a difference a day made
Less than twenty-four little hours
Brought the gloom and the showers
Where there used to be joy
My yesterday was true, dear
Today I’m feeling so blue, dear
My happy nights are through, dear
Since we went with Phil Hughes
What a difference a day makes
There’s a rainbow behind me
Skies above can’t be sunny
Since those pitches went amiss, boy am I pissed!
It’s hell when you find no chance on your menu
What a difference a day made
And the difference is Hughes
What a difference a day makes
There’s a rainbow behind me
Skies above can’t be sunny
Since those pitches went amiss, boy am I pissed!
It’s hell when you find no chance on your menu
What a difference a day made
And the difference is Hughes
Is Hughes
For more of David’s Yankee obsessions, check out his blog, Pseudo-Intellectualism.
Before thy vic’try p’rades begin,
With Sterling’d tongue and Suzyn’d spin,
Be gone, olde curd! Ye shalt not sin!
One gaem doth not thy playoffs win!
Let no grand pride swell deep within
Thy supple breast, thy pinstripe’d skin,
Let nay among ye boast to Twin!
One gaem doth not thy playoffs win!
Do not thy winner’s hanky wave,
Scout not the Philly, G’int or Brave.
These brutish Twins we’ve yet to stave.
One gaem doth not Octobre save!
This poem was pilfered from Hart’s Yankee blog, It is High, It is Far, It is …. Caught.