Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
By Stuart Shea
ORIOLES
Thousands of tweeters
Will talk of Matt Wieters while
Driving their beaters.
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RED SOX
The spring mist rises
From the humid Fens again…
Wait, that’s fan B.O.
.
YANKEES
Autumn nears for A-
Rod, Mo, Jeter, Posada,
And, yes, Randy Winn.
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RAYS
A young rotation,
Some MVP candidates,
A tough division.
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BLUE JAYS
The center fielder
Needs to break his fall this spring–
Then all will be Wells.
Posted 4/6/2010
by Stephen Jones
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Fans blue-covered waves
Crested with white confetti
Their cheers an ocean
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Posted 11-16-09
by Sid Yiddish
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A 27th title
A 27th crown
I don’t believe it,
Did those Yankees buy it off like the 2003 Florida Marlins?
What’s a little extra cash between friends?
What’s a little stash hidden, what’s a little trash talk, just coz other teams didn’t win?
Blame it on the Yankees.
Since 2001 have been buying players black-market style, just to satisfy the fans.
Blame it on the Yankees
When A-Rod takes steroids
Blame it on the Yankees
When umpires look the other way
Blame it on the Yankees
When a new stadium was built and cost a ton
Blame it on the Yankees
When the new yarns are spun
Blame it on the Yankees
When the old legends mysteriously disappeared
Blame it on the Yankees
When they played on our worst fears
Blame it on the Yankees
When the Phillies lost hard
Blame it on the Yankees
When they caught the fans off-guard
Blame it on the Yankees
When they pulled hits out of thin air
Blame it on the Yankees
When they won the World Series fair and square
Blame it on the Yankees
Blame it on the Yankees
Because they always will.
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Posted 11/11/2009
by Kevin R.A. DeCandido
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Here’s to A-Rod and his Centaur pic
Here’s to Damon Johnny and Swisher Nick
Here’s to CC, A.J., and Mo
Here’s to Molina, Cervelli, and Po
Here’s to the Captain in the leadoff spot
Here’s to Marte for getting red-hot
Here’s to Teixeira and his stretchy right leg
Here’s to fifth starters for which we would beg
Here’s to Joba and Phil, arms for the future
Here’s to Chien-Ming Wang and his sutures
Here’s to Melky and Gardner, fighting for starts
Here’s to Hairston and Hinske and other spare parts
Here’s to Cashman who put it together
Here’s to Cano, who can’t handle bad weather
Here’s to the bullpen from D-Rob to Ace
Here’s to Pettitte and the killer gaze
Here’s to Matsui, Most Valuable Player
And here’s to Girardi, who’ll need a new number.
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Posted 11/5/2009
by James Finn Garner
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 Dedicated to skittish Yankee fans everywhere:
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When your son asks you advice on mascara,
When your head’s a-flame and your mouth’s a Sahara,
When that small, still voice inside prattles like Berra–
I’ve got two words:
Mariano Rivera.
When you’re uprooted and force-marched to some terra
Incognita, a dark, doomed hell where a perky Sarah
Palin is president and not just a chimera–
I’ve got two words:
Mariano Rivera.
When you yearn for escape and consider hara-
Kiri–Breathe deep, relax, don a fresh guayabera,
And watch the greatest hero since Before the Common Era–
He’ll bless you and keep you:
Mariano Rivera.
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Posted 11/3/2009