by Larry Epke
.
I thought I’d seen all
‘Til I heard the words, “Pitching
For New York – Swisher!”
.
Posted 4/29/09
Anthony Claggett
by Hart Seely
.
Anthony Claggett,
Your fastball, they flag it.
It floats like a maggot,
They wait there and tag it.
Throw harder, or bag it.
Anthony Claggett.
Anthony Claggett,
We’ll rip you in agate,
Your body, we’ll drag it.
Meet quim, you best shag it.
Or, otherwise, bag it.
Anthony Claggett.
.
Hart Seely is the author of Mother Goose Goes to Washington, as well as Oh Holy Cow: The Selected Verse of Phil Rizzuto, newly released in a 15th-anniversary edition. He often hangs around the Yankee website, It is High, It is Far, It is….caught, offering tasteful and constructive comments to management and players alike.
Posted 4/21/09.
Yankee Stadium Exhibition Opener
by Ember Nickel
.
Precariously perched between the spring
Of simple fantasies and the real thing
Becoming more peerless with every day–
Can I criticize an excuse to play?
I watched it on the computer, full-screen.
The scoreboards I’ve seen look much like this. Bright
Garish ads with limitless width and height.
The game filled the screen, and usually worked.
But sometimes it jerked and blurred, like it had
Been magnified too far, like that was bad.
Four-four in the fourth inning. Fours could not
Be wild, I’d thought. Too big for the game
They might repeat–but it is not the same.
.
A former contributor to Baseball Toaster, Ember’s blog is Lipogram! Scorecard!, where this poem first appeared.
Posted 4/13/09.
Robbie Cano
by Hart Seely
Robbie Cano,
He’s very rich.
Robbie Cano,
Won’t take a pitch.
Robbie Cano,
Both night and day,
Robbie Cano,
Just swings away.
Robbie Cano,
In spring and fall,
Robbie Cano,
Won’t take a ball.
Robbie Cano,
Makes too much dough,
Robbie Cano,
He’s gotta go.
.
Hart Seely is the author of Mother Goose Goes to Washington, as well as Oh Holy Cow: The Selected Verse of Phil Rizzuto, newly released in a 15th-anniversary edition. He often hangs around the Yankee website, It is High, It is Far, It is….caught, offering tasteful and constructive comments to management and players alike.
Posted 4/8/09
AMERICAN LEAGUE EAST 2009 HAIKU FORECASTS
By Stuart Shea
RAYS
Last year’s fish is cooked.
Singing songs of spring, the team
Trawls for the title.
RED SOX
Dust is in the air.
Dustin is in the infield.
Just get me a cloth.
YANKEES
$300 trillion
And they say they can’t afford
A spare infielder?
BLUE JAYS
Rock and hard place—both
Tough to climb when you work with
Canada dollars.
ORIOLES
When does that new show,
“Waiting for Weiters” come on?
Not quickly enough.
Posted 3/30/09.