Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
By Stu Shea
John McDonald made a play,
TOR-O-N-T-O,
And on this play he got two outs,
TOR-O-N-T-O,
With a great dive here
And a long throw there,
Here a dive,
There a dive,
Every day a great dive,
John McDonald made a play,
TOR-O-N-T-O.
Posted 9/18/07
by Bob Ausbourne
My heart has beat as a D-Ray
Since th’ first pitch of th’ initial day.
It’s so hard to cope,
But there always is hope–
It springs eternal, they say!
By Stuart Shea
Wild Bill Hagy was an Orioles fan,
Looked like most any other big man,
Belly hanging low over loose blue jeans,
Full of cold beer and likewise of beans.
Back in the days ‘fore Camden Yards,
When the orange-clad O’s held all the cards,
Wild Bill Hagy was a half-crazed horse
Who pawed his ground as a cheerleading force.
He stood on the dugout during each game
And spelled out “Orioles” with his mighty frame.
Every O’s fan from near and far
Watched Wild Bill—he became a star.
The years rolled on and the O’s declined,
They left Memorial for a new state of mind.
Hagy didn’t lead cheers at the new park,
The team’s new owners didn’t like that spark.
And now he’s gone, though memories hold,
Of the glorious days of Orioles old,
Of Weaver and Murray, Palmer and Cal,
Dempsey, Roenicke, Pat Kelly, and Al.
Gimme an H!
Gimme an A!
Gimme a G!
Gimme a Y!
What’s that spell?
Posted 8/29/2007
by James Finn Garner
Thirty runs hath the Rangers,
To whom before big games were strangers.
The Orioles ‘pen came out to play
And gave a goose to their ERA.
Saltalamacchia swung his stick
and helped his average 83 clicks.
“Too bad,” the moms of O’s might mewl,
“The bigs don’t have a slaughter rule.”
Posted 8/24/2007
Goose Gossage,
Goose Gossage,
You are your own Bossage,
You have your own mitt that you sign and Embossage.
Goose Gossage,
Goose Gossage,
You always will Flossage,
Your round rolling stone will ne’er gather no Mossage.
Goose Gossage,
Goose Gossage,
You boot up with DOSsage,
You always predict the results of coin Tossage.
Goose Gossage,
Goose Gossage,
Your car drives with Nossage,
And you play like you dance, like the winged Bob Fossage.
(Sandy’s site, with his comedy teammates: Schadenfreude.net)
Posted 8/3/07