Elegy: For Dave Niehaus

By Stuart Shea

To watch for years a losing team,
He’d root and hope and sometimes scream.
Alvin D and Junior G,
Edgar M and Gaylord P,
Til ’95–a magic dream!

Familiar things he’d shout and cry…
A grand salami, my oh my!
Seattle fans will miss his call,
This one’s sailing toward the wall…
Fly away, Dave. It’s gone. Goodbye.

Halladay – Lee

by Cormican

In the euphoria of the NLCS, this Phillies fan contemplated a pitching duel for the ages and channeled the spirit of Edgar Allan Poe for this poem.  Alas, the matchup wasn’t meant to be, which adds the appropriate amount of heartbreak to this homage to Poe.

It was many and many a month ago
.   In a ballpark in NYC
That an Ace there pitched so nonchalant
.   That caught pop-ups non-chalantly

He was an ace and Doc was an Ace
.  at this ballpark in South Philly
Dare we dream of a game that is more than a game
.  One with Halladay – Lee
With an arm that the horned demons in Bronx
.  Coveted Clifton P. Lee

And this was the reason that, months ago
.  In this ballpark in South Philly
A smug came out, refurbished the farm
.  by trading our Clifton P. Lee
So that our deep pocket neighbors can
.  can sign him from SEA
To set him up with Sabbathia
.  In their kingdom in NYC

The Rangers, not half as blessed with pitching
.  Went trading with SEA for Lee
Yes, this was the season (as old men know,
.  for the team that was once from DC)
That the Doc came out of a cold north town
.  Starting and stopping their Clifton P. Lee

But their team it was far stronger than the teams
.  Of those with Chocolate Chili
.  Of those with Jerry Garci…
And neither the Angels in Los Angeles/Anaheim
.  Or the demons in Bronx, NYC
Can ever dissever Game one from Game one
.  ‘gainst Rangers,’gainst Yankees

For when a game starts, the players start winning my heart
.  Especially Halladay – Lee
Other stars will rise, but none, in my eyes
.  match the aces that this night I see
And so as the sun died, I sat down on my hide
With my Yuengling – my Riesling – my team and my bride
.  See the stadium in South Philly
.  In the glory of Halladay – Lee.

Found on the Phillies blog, The Good Phight.

The Battle of Seattle

by James Finn Garner

Don Wakamatsu, he
Told Chone Figgins, “Hit the showers.”
Figgins, a la Hong Kong Phooey,
Showed how he can hit for power.

Tie the skipper to the mast,
Seattle’s ship is sinking fast.

Putting Junior to Bed

By Stuart Shea

.

He no longer earns a roster spot
Or even earns his keep.
The one thing that Ken Griffey’s earned
Is a nice long sleep.

.

Posted 5/17/10

American League West 2010 Haiku Forecasts

By Stuart Shea

ANGELS
Rich Latino woos
White fans who usually hire
Latino workmen.

ATHLETICS
Moneyball’s sunset
Means the lineup now includes
Kevin Kouzmanoff.

MARINERS
Hey, Jack Z….that nut
That fell off the hitting tree?
He’s your problem now.

RANGERS
Sweet spring robins’ song
May sound suspiciously like
“Neftali Feliz.”

.

Posted 4/20/2010