Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
Gray rain pours down on/
Burgundy slate roof.
Red, white, blue, bunting on/
Emerald snack-bar hung.
Lemonade cold in/
Clear plastic bucket.
Orange bus on/
Black pavement, wet.
White lines criss-cross, run/
Red clay infield, mud.
Brown patches in/
Green grass outfield.
Golden sun waited-on by/
Purple-clad Little Leaguers.
Yellow rain-slick worn over/
Navy suited Umpire.
Play ball?
Things were so bad in Havana
That it ends with you havin’ a
Snack of your fake Haitian passport–
Heineken? Shoulda tried Special Export!
For Mrs. O’Leary’ Cow and the 2016 World Champion Chicago Cubs
Mrs. O’Leary’s cow better hide:
Cubs fans now toddle down Near North Side,
Feeding schneid’s hungry ghost
With Burnt Scapegoat Cubs Roast;
Chitown’s hottest night since Old Town cried.
Birria for Everyone!
’Twas a plot that a lunatic wrote
With a knot firmly caught in his throat
Pop the bubbly, boys,
For the Cubs, make some noise
Took a lot, but we slaughtered the goat.
Back to Cleveland and Erie’s south shore,
To even the series … and more?
If Chicago’s a winner
Chief Wahoo, that grinner,
Will be heaving warm beer on the floor.