Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
Yo Willie McGee,
Hey Willie McGee
Your bat will stay still if you listen to me
It goes back and forth,
Precision Swiss watch
So try not to move and bust balls like Ed Koch
But wait, now you’re still
And obeying some rule
That was set out to force you to suffer a fool!
My bad, Willie Dean
Stay the same, keep that swing
Tick the tock of your bat and you’ll be MVP!
Visit Sandy and his improv comedy palz at the Schadenfreude website.Â
Posted 10/23/07
Could have been the jingle
of his name that led him
to the banking game.
But then again, he was
“Chet Thrift” with runs
back in fifty-one
When his ERA was lowest
in the Senior Circuit —
his winning mark
just a tad higher
than prime!
Posted 10/19/07Â
by James Finn Garner
500
Is such an exquisite digit–
The miles in a Daytona race,
Fortune‘s biggest firms anyplace,
And Fiat’s postwar car-midget.
500
The dingers hit by “Big Hurt” Frank,
Of the sweet stroke and bitter knees,
A-Rod, whipping boy for the Yankees,
And Thome, svelte as a Sherman tank.
500
Their several teams never captured it all.
The sluggers pushed on in good years and bad,
Taking what pleasure there was to be had
In campaigns of .500 ball.
500!
Carved into history like Cy Nostradamus.
As Father Time erodes, hobbles and tames,
That mark will always shine next to these names.
500 cheers for Thome, Rodriguez and Thomas!
Posted 10/16/07Â
by Tom LaTourette
Posted 10/14/07
A tattered scorecard,
A pennant,
An autograph or two.
For most kids that will do as a souvenir from a day at the game.
A double-header; what could be better?
This kid, two to three times the age of your average player, never had a
prayer that she would return home with such a treasure.
It was a foul ball up into the stands.
Grown men ducked, children raised their mitts aloft, but it was I who caught
the ball.
The crowd gave a cheer!
And this kid went home with her souvenir in her purse, and the Cubs beat the
Sox, so what could be worse?
The South against the North.
Oh, how that ball did soar
At this modern-day civil war.
Posted 10/9/07Â