Darn Sox

by Greg Simetz

“Say it ain’t so,”
a kid once asked Shoeless Joe
the year the White Sox turned to black

The same could be asked
of the current Sox cast
filled with the lame, the halt and hacks

So laughter erupts
when owner Reinsdorf instructs
he’ll move the team south to Tennessee

If a new stadium isn’t built
and financed to the hilt
with Illinois taxpayer’s sucker money

But a record-setting pace
in a season of historic disgrace
makes 120+ defeats a bona fide threat

So Jerry, pack your hitless wonders
and move instead to baseball’s dumpster,
next to the more lovable ‘62 Mets.

 

Kellogg’s at the Bat

Oh somewhere in this favored land the sun is shining bright
The band is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light,
And somewhere men are laughing, and somewhere children shout
But there is no joy in Mudville — for the Corn Flakes are fresh out.

Kellogg’s ad, 1963

Dear Facundo

by Jim Siergey

He played in just 69 games,
Of obscurity he was a paragon
But he had one of my favorite names:
Rest in peace, Cuno Barragan.

June 20, 1932 — May 12, 2024

(He DID hit a home run in his first major league at-bat.)

 

Tell All the Stats but Tell them Slant

by Dr. Rajesh C. Oza

In honor of Emily Dickinson, 1830-1886. In 1887, the first Negro League was formed.

Tell all the stats but tell them slant —
Success in the baseball Circuit lies
Too bright for our unconscious bias
The Truth’s superb surprise is
Like a ball hit lightening quick
With Josh Gibson atop
Ty Cobb’s dazzling batting record
Or every fan be blind —