by Sid Yiddish
.
in Denmark,
they play no baseball
no concept of it at all
just Yankee caps
and Red Sox fans
hidden inside the homes
among the fruited plains
.
Posted 5/19/2010
Putting Junior to Bed
By Stuart Shea
.
He no longer earns a roster spot
Or even earns his keep.
The one thing that Ken Griffey’s earned
Is a nice long sleep.
.
Posted 5/17/10
McGwire’s Place in History
by Doug White
.
He once chased Aaron and Ruth
With the callow aggression of youth,
But from his head to his toes,
Just like Petey F. Rose,
McGwire won’t face up to the truth.
Posted 5/17/10
Dear Alfonso Soriano
by James Finn Garner
.
Dear Alfonso, I cannot lie.
You know I’m not that kind of guy.
For I have always had your back,
Even as you whiffed and hacked.
When you swung lumber like a mop
Or broke your foot with your little hop,
I defended you — I DID! —
Saying, “Let the kid just be a kid.”
All the rest demanded skin
But I stood by through thick and thin.
I’ve always been your biggest fan —
But don’t f#@& up like that again!
.
Posted 5/14/2010
Philly Ball Park Guard and Taser
By Hart Seely
Hot beneath the raging sun,
Running in his cheap suit blazer,
Trigger-happy with his gun,
Philly ballpark guard – with taser.
Rumbling like a rented van,
Aiming carefully his laser,
Firing on some hapless fan,
Philly ballpark guard – with taser.
Creepo at the junior prom,
Sicko wielding rusted razor,
Castro with a nuclear bomb,
Philly ballpark guard – with taser.
.
Posted 5/11/10