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To-Do List

By Ember Nickel
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There’s more than clocks that must be cleaned in spring:
Some clocks were cleaned, but we don’t need them here.
There’s new faces to meet, all who will bring
Something different to their team for this year.
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So say hello to Halladay. Don’t say
That Placido need be placid, though. Greet
Greenhorns around the leagues. Proudly call “hey”
To Justin Heyward and each star you meet.
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Try your best to keep up with Garrett Jones.
Welcome back Marcum. Spring’s glories fade fast
So soak it all in before it all drones
Into no more than murmurs of the past.
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Learn more of phenoms that you may have heard
Just briefly of. Say hi. Welcome a Byrd.

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Posted 4/21/2010

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American League West 2010 Haiku Forecasts

By Stuart Shea

ANGELS
Rich Latino woos
White fans who usually hire
Latino workmen.

ATHLETICS
Moneyball’s sunset
Means the lineup now includes
Kevin Kouzmanoff.

MARINERS
Hey, Jack Z….that nut
That fell off the hitting tree?
He’s your problem now.

RANGERS
Sweet spring robins’ song
May sound suspiciously like
“Neftali Feliz.”

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Posted 4/20/2010

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The Last Time I Saw Maris

by Joe Pacheco

 

The last time I saw Maris
His hair was thin and gray,
He’d only hit just one home run
Since last Memorial Day.

The last time I saw Maris
His record still at risk,
In Babe Ruth’s town they’d brought him down
With bogus asterisk.

He smiled through all the muted cheers
That he had heard for years,
The chorus of ingratitude
Still ringing in his ears.

The last time I saw Maris
Was on Old-Timers Day,
Before the steroid sluggers
Came to batter his fame away.

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Posted 4/15/2010

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American League Central 2010 Haiku Forecasts

By Stuart Shea

WHITE SOX
A Putz in the ‘pen,
Another in the dugout,
Not just birds Twitter.
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INDIANS
No more wedge issues.
It’s time to see just how good
This ballclub can be.
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TIGERS
A brand new springtime?
Whatchoo talkin’ bout, Willis?
This is your autumn.
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ROYALS
Inevitable
As tulips and tree pollen,
95 losses.
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TWINS
Mauer power is
Ensured for many more moons
In the new playpen.

Posted 4/11/2009

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American League East 2010 Haiku Forecasts

By Stuart Shea

ORIOLES
Thousands of tweeters
Will talk of Matt Wieters while
Driving their beaters.
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RED SOX
The spring mist rises
From the humid Fens again…
Wait, that’s fan B.O.
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YANKEES
Autumn nears for A-
Rod, Mo, Jeter, Posada,
And, yes, Randy Winn.
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RAYS
A young rotation,
Some MVP candidates,
A tough division.
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BLUE JAYS
The center fielder
Needs to break his fall this spring–
Then all will be Wells.

Posted 4/6/2010