Category: Scandals

by Lou Carlozo

Despite Barry Bonds’ many homers,
It appears that his body’s a loaner,

For his steroid technique
Birthed an android’s physique:

An aluminum bat for a boner.

by Doug White

Took the best chemicals that man could make
Because a prized record he wanted to break,

But too many injections
Led to so much rejection,

And thus Barry’s been labeled a fake

by Tom Shea

O, his blood is clean as a geranium!
Here’s how Barry Bonds fills every stadium:

Weight work in the off-season
‘S the sole, simple reason

For his huge, massive, 90-pound cranium.