Category: Scandals

by Doug White

Took the best chemicals that man could make
Because a prized record he wanted to break,

But too many injections
Led to so much rejection,

And thus Barry’s been labeled a fake

by Tom Shea

O, his blood is clean as a geranium!
Here’s how Barry Bonds fills every stadium:

Weight work in the off-season
‘S the sole, simple reason

For his huge, massive, 90-pound cranium.

by Jim Powers

Though Bonds swings a bat with great speed,
He calls juice accusations hackneyed.

“What fun is to hit?
I don’t give a shit–

I like sliding on slick shoulders acne’d.”