Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
He arrived to throes
of joyous anticipation.
Say it ain’t Sho…
He went on to meet
About ev’ry expectation.
Just say no, Sho…
Discussed everywhere:
an awful new revelation.
Say it ain’t Sho…
The baseball world torn,
with the Cooperstown bronze dulling.
Say it ain’t Sho…
He pitches! Hits! Bets?
Despite first throes, the bloom is off
… Ohtani’s Rose.
I see you guys in the video room,
just looking at your swings,
reading all these stats.
At some point, you have to just say,
“F— all that s—”
and just go out there and hit.
All I hear is y’all talking about
launch angle
and tendences
and exit velocity.
F—ing exit velocity!?
Motherf—ing exit velocity?!
How about motherf—ing exit hits?!
No use in blinking
at the fact
that at that time the game was thought,
by respectable people,
to be only one degree above
grand larceny,
arson,
mayhem
and those who engaged in it were
beneath notice of
decent society.
Thanks to Jim Koenigsberger @Jimfrombaseball.
the lovely white orb came
i hit it.