Youth – Page 44

Yankees 4, Twins 3

Coming-out party
Rookie Greg Bird home-runs twice
The Baby Bomber

Is Starlin out tonight?
Is his future cloudy or bright?
Cubs think that he’s way overdue

Fans’ hopes are all high
They see that pie in the sky
Cubs like Baez and Russell, too

We all know the choice is a hard one
Shortstop’s a crowded avenue

He’s still here, some ask “Why?”
His batting average once was high
But now it’s disappearing from view
And Joe doesn’t have eyes for you

So, is Starlin out tonight?
Will Adam or Javy be right?
Will he no longer wear Cubbie Blue?

What vet should I get?
Who doesn’t put me into debt.
A pitcher like A.J. Burnett…
What vet should I get?

A Price would be nice!
I wouldn’t think twice!
I’d certainly bite
If the Price is right.

I could get a Cole Hamels,
For my best Scranton mammals,
Who might be Allan Trammels!
(Plus a carton of Camels.)

I could get a Martin Prado,
For a year’s supply of Play-Doh.
If I got a new Craig Kimbrel,
My bullpen would be downright crim’nal!

I could get Aroldis Chapman,
What would Boston think of THAT, man?
Or I’d settle for Mike Leake,
Though that name has me feeling bleak.

What vet should I get?
And trade a guy we’ll soon forget.
Who won’t become the next George Brett.
What vet should I get?

Hart Seely is head honcho of the indispensable Yankee blog, It Is High, It Is Far, It Is . . . caught. He does not ghostwrite for the estate of Dr. Seuss.

What the heck rhymes with Kyle Schwarber?

Well, ’60s jazzer Alan Lorber,
And that dancing Greek named Zorber,
And folk singer Steve Forber(t),
And . . .
And . . .

I’m at the bottom of the pail,
And I don’t want him to fail . . .
But his name is odd, I fear,
So he may not have many poems here.

In The Land of the Second Chance,
Remorseful A-Rod did repentance,
Will not be going to Cincinnati.

Few will shed tears about this, most likely,
But truth be told–he served his time.
Reality is: He’s passed his prime.

Now it’s marquee time . . . for Harper, for Trout.
And A-Rod? He’s simply lost his clout.