Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
Man, with every passing hour
I want to hear less of Trevor Bauer
Suing a reporter from The Athletic
For defamation is pathetic
If he doesn’t give a depostion
A jury can consider that position
And if he talks, all we’ll find
is a violent and defective mind
Acting wildly victimized
About the woman he sodomized
After punching her unconscious–
This bro is completely noxious.
The CBA won’t stop teams from tanking
Or boost what rookies are banking
But keeps Alcantara
A non-batter-a
For small blessings (I guess) I am thanking.
Soler’s a basher, but Dusty’s hexed,
Fried the first winning Jew since Koufax–
Between cheating and chop,
Though, I for one hop
Next year’s series will lack for subtext.
Atlanta’s faithful are true believers
But can Snitker depend just on relievers?
Then again, what the heck
It’s all hands on deck
Or the Braves look like underachievers.
Please don’t react with alarm
Gonna start saying “arm barn”.
The greed it’s proclaiming
with crypto and gaming
Has cost the game much of its charm.
