Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
The backwards cap, the silk-smooth swing
Once again, The Kid feels like The King.
No steroids talk, no BALCO rumor–
The game has always been pure fun for Junior.
Back in the outfield, out in San Fran
If only everything had gone to plan.
An All-Star once again, out in the bay
Nostalgia knocks: dreams of Griffey’s heyday.
Posted 7/16/07
(Sorry to get to it a week after the All-Star Game, Cory)
One after one they came into the game
From free agency and the farm
Each took his place on the mound
And cursed me with his arm
Two times fifteen blown saves
And with plenty a sigh and a groan
With belt-high fastballs and hanging curves
They gave up runs one by one
Biceps like well-tempered iron,
Frightening to see,
Was Ted Kluszewski.
No shirtsleeves wore he,
Did Ted Kluszewski.
And if you asked him why, he’d
Grind you into loose tea.
In his day he was feared,
The toughest man on the Ponderosa.
But today his muscles are matched
By Sammy Sosa
And Mark DeRosa.
By Doug White
There once was a pitcher named Snell
Who didn’t throw particularly well.
When he hung a curve too high,
David Ross let it fly,
Then the hurler gave the poor ballpark hell.