Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
What do Cub fans have on their wish list
Now that they face the future Darvish-less?
Can any hope be placed in Strop?
Will they turn a corner with Nico Hoerner?
Will they strike the timbrels at a rebound of Kimbrel?
Will fervor awake at the return of Jake?
How about Bote? Up to the job? Even remotely?
Pederson? Romine? Any rosy storyline?
Face it, once fans are let through the gates,
They’d watch monkeys on roller skates.
If you yearn to watch Hendriks or Strop
You’d best learn to be cautious and hope
This doubleheader
Is no superspreader
Mask up, Verne, and don’t be a dope.
On the ’66 Dodgers
I was the youngster on a staff of mostly veterans,
and I learned all I could from them
I couldn’t learn to throw a fastball or curve
like Koufax, that’s something that can’t be taught
But there were a couple of others
I could and did learn some tricks from
(wink wink)
I won’t rat them out even posthumously;
they know who they are,
and they have my eternal gratitude
There once was a Dodger named Sutton
Whose pitches were right on the button
But when in a pinch
Sandpaper he’d clinch
And give the baseball a good scuffin’.
Theo’s decision:
time’s right–leave Friendly Confines
work magic elsewhere.