by Darryl Warren
Bear with me, please, trust me I’m casting
In search of a rhyme for Milledge, Lastings.
Posted 6/21/10
To-Do List
By Ember Nickel
.
There’s more than clocks that must be cleaned in spring:
Some clocks were cleaned, but we don’t need them here.
There’s new faces to meet, all who will bring
Something different to their team for this year.
.
So say hello to Halladay. Don’t say
That Placido need be placid, though. Greet
Greenhorns around the leagues. Proudly call “hey”
To Justin Heyward and each star you meet.
.
Try your best to keep up with Garrett Jones.
Welcome back Marcum. Spring’s glories fade fast
So soak it all in before it all drones
Into no more than murmurs of the past.
.
Learn more of phenoms that you may have heard
Just briefly of. Say hi. Welcome a Byrd.
.
Posted 4/21/2010
National League Central 2010 Haiku Forecasts
by Stuart Shea
.
CUBS
Whither the Starlin?
For now, he makes a nest out west
In loverly Des Moines.
.
CARDINALS
Blah de blah de blah.
Pujols is going to be dealt.
When hell is frozen.
.
ASTROS
Old, boring players,
Mediocre announcers,
Fans that prefer football.
.
BREWERS
A Wolf is Riske,
But worth two in the Bush. Bring
Hoffman a Coffey.
.
PIRATES
I walk in the park
So pretty, green, bright, and lush.
Ugh! The Bucs play here.
.
REDS
Ardolis Chapman.
Good for 200 wins or shoulder problems,
It’s up to Dusty.
.
Posted 3/23/2010
Pirate S#&@
by Stu Shea
.
Freddie and Jack play for Pittsburgh,
Losers for many a year,
It’s not hard to see
That this century
Local fans want a winner to cheer.
The Pirate ship’s listing and lurching,
Taking on water and flies.
Nobody’s good
And it’s understood
That “untouchable” doesn’t apply.
Freddie and Jack want new contracts.
Fred can’t play second at all.
Jack cannot hit,
And the team’s for s#&@,
These guys ain’t en route to The Hall.
.
Posted 8/18/2009
National League Central 2009 Haiku Forecasts
by Stuart Shea
CUBS
Spring wish, autumn dreams
Green of youth and rust of age
Hope is…Kevin Gregg?
BREWERS
Prince Fielder’s a veg.
The racing sausages can
Rest easy all summer.
ASTROS
Bummer! Bits of sun
Are all that Minute Maid Park
Will see this season.
CARDINALS
Converted Skippy
Will be a sitting pigeon
For one hard slide.
REDS
Screw Dusty Baker!
The Reds have enough talent
To win despite him.
PITTSBURGH
Winter’s not the time
To start rebuilding a house
With no foundation.
Posted 3/23/09