The Legend of the Racing Pierogi

by James Finn Garner
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An opinionated pierogi
(Not bratwurst, donut or hoagie)
Got canned by the Bucs,
Who then looked liked schmucks.
He’s back racing — that doughy rogue, he!
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For background on this newsworthy event, click here.

Posted 7/7/2010

July 7th, 2010

Perilous Pursuit of the Perfect Rhyme

by Darryl Warren

Bear with me, please, trust me I’m casting
In search of a rhyme for Milledge, Lastings.

Posted 6/21/10

June 21st, 2010

To-Do List

By Ember Nickel
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There’s more than clocks that must be cleaned in spring:
Some clocks were cleaned, but we don’t need them here.
There’s new faces to meet, all who will bring
Something different to their team for this year.
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So say hello to Halladay. Don’t say
That Placido need be placid, though. Greet
Greenhorns around the leagues. Proudly call “hey”
To Justin Heyward and each star you meet.
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Try your best to keep up with Garrett Jones.
Welcome back Marcum. Spring’s glories fade fast
So soak it all in before it all drones
Into no more than murmurs of the past.
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Learn more of phenoms that you may have heard
Just briefly of. Say hi. Welcome a Byrd.

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Posted 4/21/2010

April 21st, 2010

National League Central 2010 Haiku Forecasts

by Stuart Shea
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CUBS
Whither the Starlin?
For now, he makes a nest out west
In loverly Des Moines.
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CARDINALS
Blah de blah de blah.
Pujols is going to be dealt.
When hell is frozen.
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ASTROS
Old, boring players,
Mediocre announcers,
Fans that prefer football.
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BREWERS
A Wolf is Riske,
But worth two in the Bush. Bring
Hoffman a Coffey.
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PIRATES
I walk in the park
So pretty, green, bright, and lush.
Ugh! The Bucs play here.
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REDS
Ardolis Chapman.
Good for 200 wins or shoulder problems,
It’s up to Dusty.

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Posted 3/23/2010

March 23rd, 2010

Pirate S#&@

by Stu Shea

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Freddie and Jack play for Pittsburgh,
Losers for many a year,
It’s not hard to see
That this century
Local fans want a winner to cheer.

The Pirate ship’s listing and lurching,
Taking on water and flies.
Nobody’s good
And it’s understood
That “untouchable” doesn’t apply.

Freddie and Jack want new contracts.
Fred can’t play second at all.
Jack cannot hit,
And the team’s for s#&@,
These guys ain’t en route to The Hall.

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Posted 8/18/2009

August 18th, 2009