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“Money Ball” MVP

by the Village Elliott

For Josh Donaldson

“Oh by golly, by gosh,
Why’d Beane have to trade Josh?”
Cried fan who’s an A’s East Bay mourner.
“He belongs with our A’s,
Not up north with the Jays,
There playing Toronto’s hot corner!
Now Josh Donaldson’s the
Presumptive MVP
Of the AL, at least he so plays;
While Beane signs bodies warm,
Without legs, hands or arm,
To play the hot corner for the A’s!”

Reckon my friend forgot
Billy owns part of pot,
Kind of like the Cards and Branch Rickey.*
Deal the A’s made with Beane
When the Red Sox seemed keen,
Suggesting Beane, like Rickey, is “tricky”;
Trading deadline is nigh.
Soon fans might say “goodbye”
To both Scott Kazmir and Sonny Gray,
For I doubt Beane forgot
Like Branch, his piece of pot
Is part of what makes Money Ball pay.

PS: Only took half a day
Till Beane traded away
Scott Kazmir, as we all knew he would,
In return, two unknowns
Causing more A’s fans’ groans,
Knowing these guys are gone if they’re good.
___________________________

* When Branch Rickey and Cards,
Owned by Breadon, were pards,
Branch got a cut of each deal he made;
With his farm system flush,
Rickey deemed it a “rush,”
To sell players so he is well paid.
“The Pious Hypocrite”
In his office would sit,
Trade players, not year late, one early;
Rickey never looked back,
Busy counting his stack.
Others thought him impious and surly.

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…of All That is Seen and Unseen…

By Stuart Shea

Never got to see
Parc Jarry.
Ebbets and the Polo Grounds
Remained unfound.
Forbes Field
To me unrevealed.

But I did run with glee
Through old Comiskey
And Tiger Stadium
Was like a palladium
And Milwaukee County
An endless bounty.

Dank, damp, and rusty,
Outmoded and fusty,
But to me much more fun
Than Wrigley, say, has become.

 

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Jewish Baseball Museum

by Andrew Porter

Of Jewish baseball cards, there’s quite a selection,
But I’ve assembled the biggest collection.
And the prideful fans who’d like to see ‘em,
Will love to tour my Baseball Museum.

There’s dozens of tales about every big league Jew,
So I hope not to bore you if I share just a few.

Hank Greenberg was a Tiger, tall with game
And he’s now enshrined in the Hall of Fame.
Today they’d say, “That kid can rake!”
With his 100-plus ribbies at the All-Star Break.

But the hero knew what he was needed for:
He served the longest in the Second World War.
Returning late in ’45 to lift Detroit from a frightful jam,
He clinched the pennant with a walk off grand slam.

And those who know no facts, must surely know Koufax.
Greatest lefty of them all, youngest elected to the Hall.
The Jewish fans screamed at the top of their lungs!
He had four no-hitters and three Cy Young’s.
Two thousand strikeouts and plus some more,
Then skipped the Series on Yom Kippur.

Moe Berg, a ballplayer with nary a flaw.
Princeton undergrad, Columbia Law.
A catcher for the White Sox — the Senators too.
But also a spy during World War II.
He traveled to Germany with orders to kill
And stealthily filmed Tokyo from the top of a hill.

So many other interesting facts abound,
Where these precious baseball cards will soon be found.

Guy Zinn left an indelible mark:
He scored the first run ever at Fenway Park.

And Barney Pelty, the Yiddish Curver, surely tasted whiskey:
He pitched a shutout when they opened Comiskey.

While Sam Nahem read Marx and Engel,
Lefty Weinert beaned Casey Stengel.

Erskine Mayer pitched with grit
Though he served up Wagner’s 3,000th hit.

Al Rosen, third baseman of great renown:
A groundout cost him the Triple Crown.

Bob Tufts and Elliott Maddox both hated to lose.
Both born as gentiles, both played as Jews.

There was Cy Young winner Steven Stone,
Speedy infielder Sammy Bohne,
And Giants second baseman Andy Cohen.

So the lesson to be learned today — promise, there will be no test.
Is that mensches don’t just ride the benches.
They play ball like all the rest.

 

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“Few More Deservin'” Hall of Famer

by the Village Elliott

When Musial died, I really couldn’t name your
Oldest surviving Baseball Hall of Famer;
Learned at 97, Red Sox Bobby Doerr
Is oldest, while three others 90 or more:
There’s Albert “Red” Schoendienst who is 92,
Now Yogi, who last month just turned 90, too.
Still, third one is older; his powerful swing
Helped Giants of Gotham earn World Series ring.
Respect of the Franchise is still evident;
Invited by new champs to meet president.
Like year-older Red Sox, a star before War,
In the Negro, not Major Leagues (white like Doerr),
The player Branch Rickey first wanted to sign.
Branch wouldn’t compensate team, so Jackie broke line.
In two years he breaks Giants’ pale color scheme.
In two more, breaks Brooklyn hearts, bums Jackie’s team,
Big part of the Miracle of Coogan’s Bluff.
Mentored team’s prodigy: He taught me Right Stuff.
I was Negro League vet, but Majors raw rook,
He helped me to adjust, showed me what it took;
Was like my big brother, still is to this day,
A true Hall of Famer, says Mister “Say Hey.”
First Big League black exec, broke that color line.
Soon enters through “front door” of Cooperstown shrine,
Mid-80s, retires, stays active in game;
Jints retire number, still honor his name;
For long life in baseball, few more deservin’
Than young 96-year-old Monte Irvin.
(Adds Willie: First glove in the Big Leagues I score,
A MacGregor endorsed by Red Sox Bobby Doerr.)