By James Finn Garner
If you want to jazz your game up a bit
Try out a new base-running mitt.
X has many styles
Sure to bring smiles
And give traditionalists a fit.
Newest World Series Legend
by Fred Lovato
Rangers’ Garcia
belts 11th inning solo shot
baseball immortal
Au Revoir, Dusty
Au revoir, Dusty
In you did we trusty
Smart, passionate, steady
Toothpick at the ready
Giant, Astro, Dodger, Cub
You always improved a club
You have nothing more to prove
And lots of grandchildren to love
Raise a glass of Baker Wine
And celebrate the good times.
Pfaadt Accompl — You Gotta Be Kidding Me
by Michael X. Ferraro
My legend will soon be a Pfaadt accompli
Wait, is Lovullo coming for me?!
For 17 batters, I shackled those Phils,
Manhandling the mighty with my poison pills.
But this analytic whoozywhatzit
Overthinking has forced my exit.
Recipe for a Philly Snake Sandwich
by James Finn Garner
Start with pitching from Aaron Nola
Rich and smoky as cappicola
Add a Castellanos tater
And two bombs from Schwarber later
And hot corner sauce from Alec Bohm
Stingy as a Hogwarts gnome
Serve in a park where the foundations shake —
All that equals famine for the Snakes.
