By Stuart Shea
When Carlos Beltran came to the Bay,
He was supposed to hit SF’s troubles away.
Fans think his RBI count’s a disgrace,
But you can’t drive in runners
Who aren’t on base.
Ubaldo Ambition
by James Finn Garner
The Indians’ move was U-bold-o
Getting Jimenez away from the Rockies.
Their hot idea might end up cold, though,
If his outings continue so schlocky.
Unctuous Trade Deadline Poem
By Stuart Shea
When the Giants added beltin’ Beltran,
Bruce Bochy said, “Now I’ve got enough!”
Buster struck a curious Posey
And Aubrey walked out in a Huff.
Dick Williams: Still Pushing (RIP)
by James Finn Garner
When Oakland’s Swingin’ A’s were swingin’,
A hard-playing, mustachioed team–
Williams quit after winning two titles.
The skipper never changed or mellowed
In Expos white or Padres yellow.
Old-school grit, speed and defense vital.
Angels in heaven might hear him scream,
“You with the harp! You call that singin’?”
The Dodgers May Be Bankrupt
by Stephen Jones
The Dodgers may be bankrupt
But the team is not Frank McCourt
Player personnel should not be
Argued part of personal finance
Or a sticking part of ugly divorce
But he’s twined off-the-field calamity
With baseball history
And proved successfully
Frank McCourt is truly
A “dodger” financially