By James Finn Garner
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Because a hitter’s supposed to get hits,
Lou called Miltie a big piece of shit.
With a new gig in Seattle,
Milt’s still fighting old battles,
Showing the world that this shoe still fits.
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Posted 3/10/2010
Past Balls
by Hilary Barta
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The haunt of Octobers of olde,
The field named for Wrigley’s grown cold,
Faint echoes from bats
Of men who wear spats
Who late in the season don’t fold.
This season for Cubbies is toast.
As always, they’re missing the “post”.
There’s curses and theories
Why Cubs won’t host series.
They ought to just give up the ghost.
Each year the Cubs try to remold,
Each year the fan’s hope is fool’s gold,
But millionaire fans
Hatch bankruptcy plans:
The team to a diehard’s been sold.
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Well known as a comic artist, Hilary Barta also runs the terrific site Limerwrecks, featuring limericks on swamp monsters, film noir, comic books, and pop culture. Its daily content is a must-read.
Posted 10/20/2009
Game Over for Milton Bradley
by James Finn Garner
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Milton Bradley got into Trouble
Caught in the Wrigley Field bubble.
A Payday enormous
For such poor performance.
Now his Career’s nothing but rubble.
.
Sorry, Milt, that Chicago’s blunt fans
Made it seem less than a Candyland.
That’s the Risk that you take
Living Life by the lake.
It’s like permanent Ants in the Pants.
.
Is the Aggravation because you are black?
Balderdash, Milty, You Don’t Know Jack.
We all had a Clue
This is what you would do.
Last Word:Â Your Cranium‘s cracked.
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Posted 9/21/2009
A Cub Fan Reflects on the Astros
by Tim Souers
I wish the Astros all of the worst.
I find myself happy when they’re not in first.
With his dancing so flirty,
I wish Jose Valverde
Caught a cleat and his ligaments burst.
Published 6/12/09
Tim Souers posts new original artwork daily at his site Cubby-Blue, and is a regular illustrator for the Cubs’ monthly Vine Line.
No Love for the Losers
by Ryan Gallagher
The Pale Hose play in a town second-fiddle
To a team content to finish in the middle.
World Titles have escaped them
Though their yard, what a gem!
Fans love the Cubs, an inexplicable riddle!
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Posted 5/12/09