by James Finn Garner
He doesn’t deserve any more ink
But that Yankee jagoff sure spread his stink.
Probably racist,
But whate’er the case is,
Douche is as douche does, I do think.
In Dusty We Still Trusty
by James Finn Garner
Dusty Baker notched his 2000th win
With a toothpick lodged into his grin
No World Series ring?
That don’t mean a thing
His record requires no spin.
Photo by David J. Phillips/Associated Press
Joe West’s Worthy Successor
After saying “goodbye” to Joe West
We need to espy a new pest.
As shown with aplomb
By good ol’ Schwarbomb
Angel Hernandez is now the least best.
Good for Kyle Schwarber standing up to Angel Hernandez for both teams
“All f***ing night! The whole night! On both sides, f***ing horses**t!” pic.twitter.com/6yS40lMaFM
— Tony Clements (@TonyCMKE) April 25, 2022
Three for Miggy!
by Millie Bovich
Miggy knew well with this at bat
His brain on message ‘neath his hat
He struck the sphere
Heard thund’rous cheer
It’s Hit 3,000 — ‘magine that!
Miggy knew this was the night
And held that piece of lumber tight
A mighty swing
He whacked that thing
Just like a blast of dynamite!
3000’s not a mighty sum
If you count cars or bubble gum.
Count hits instead
I’ve heard it said
The hoopla’s ad infinitum!
Millie Bovich, a longtime Bardball contributor, has been a Tigers fan since the days of Hal Newhouser and Virgil Trucks.
Got No Shot Til You Get a Shot
by James Finn Garner
To the rest of the teams in the East
The Blue Jays now seem like a beast
If stars do not vax
They’ll find that they lack
Any way not to be the birds’ feast.
Red Sox COVID-19 vaccine issues could have a massive lasting impact