by James Finn Garner
What’s up with your team, Kansas City?
TEN players not vaxxed, what a pity!
Playing the Jays
Now needs scrubs and strays
The toll of ignorance isn’t pretty.
AL Cannibalism de Facto?
by Stephen Jones
Let’s just say
The season ended today
And the Yankees won the division…
That’s a no-brainer, a win-loss given.
But what about the rest
Of the hungry AL East —
Those Red Sox and Rays,
Those Orioles and Blue Jays?
Like it or not, three of these beasts
Rule the AL’s wild-card menu.
But hey, that’s a speculative dream,
Maybe a thought in the extreme.
It’s more likely than not
That these baseball carnivores —
Forget here any herbivores —
Will actively consume each other
In the AL East’s cannibal-diner.
Got No Shot Til You Get a Shot
by James Finn Garner
To the rest of the teams in the East
The Blue Jays now seem like a beast
If stars do not vax
They’ll find that they lack
Any way not to be the birds’ feast.
Red Sox COVID-19 vaccine issues could have a massive lasting impact
Late-Season Pleasures
by James Finn Garner
If the Orioles
Had any squad goals
Before the season kicked off
I’m sure they were higher
Than being the spoiler
For those punching into the playoffs
But be realistic
There’s been nothing artistic
Regarding the Orioles’ play
Take your fun where you can
And what’s more fun than
Pissing off the Bosox and Jays?
All-Star Clerihews 4: Frontier Justice
Fernando Tatís
Hits home runs with ease
But you should watch him try
To watch telenovelas and not cry.
Bo Bichette
Once used a baguette
To swing at a pitched ball
Left fans in stitches in Montreal.
Max Muncy
Gets pretty punchy
When you ask why his name
Sounds like a gumshoe in a board game.
Gerrit Cole
Would sell his soul
For the secret of eternal youth
And to eat hot dogs like Babe Ruth.
