By James Finn Garner
To the 700 home run goup
We can add Pujols with a whoop
After that crank
He joins Babe, Bonds and Hank
And our joy in the game we recoup.
Some Embarrassment, Some Riches
by James Finn Garner
The MVP? It must be Ohtani
Hitter and pitcher, limber and brawny
But I won’t hold a grudge
If the voters choose Judge
His supporting cast isn’t nearly as clowny.
Shohei Ohtani vs Babe Ruth
by Brian Harman
Called shots — Babe throws a
whiskey back, Shohei sips on
sake — timeless glitch
All-Star Clerihews #1: The Young and the Restless
Ian Happ
Prefers to use maps
Thinks GPS
Is tracked by the Feds.
Shohei Ohtani
Likes his kosher salami.
In fact, he thinks nothing beats
Encased meats.
Emmanuel Clasé
Will the batters assay
Then still launch a 101-MPH pitch
Bitch.
Jazz Chisholm
Thinks all our actions are a prism
Through which we disperse the One True Universal Light–
All right, man, all right….
Stumbling Angels
by Fred Lovato
Halos’ stars slumping
rest of team can’t pick up slack
Joe Maddon pays price