By Greg Simetz
A 29-year-old rook
Claimed off waiver’s wire
Has been tearing up pitchers
Setting Wrigley afire.
With the old-time name Frank
That sounds under-powered
He’s been putting up numbers
Like Franks Robinson and Howard.
Be it a game-winning slam
That set fans a-tingle
Or a headfirst slide into first
With a bizarre walk-off single.
He’s a real life Crash Davis
The longshot who paid
Taking out some of the sting
From Hoyer’s heartbreaking trades.
And though this year’s Cubs team
Will not win a ring
You can count on Schwindel
And his mighty sweet schwing!
