Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
Corey Kluber
Ain’t such a goober
As to respond to missives
From Nigerian princes.
Ross Stripling
Loves his Rudyard Kipling.
After arguing with umpires,
He enjoys stories of empire.
Alex Bregman
Claims he is the Eggman,
But we all know Elvis Andrus
Is the Walroos.
Mookie Betts
Is as good as it gets
At patiently giving curves a look-see,
and also at being named Mookie.
Chief Wahoo has been shown the gate
If only 60 years too late.
When choosing mascots, show respect–
It’s easier than you’d expect.
If I were the sole decider,
I’d resurrect the “Cleveland Spiders”,
But as a nasty little schemer,
I might go with “Cleveland Steamers”.
(Quote by Bill Veeck, of course.)
Must we
Fire Dusty
‘Cuz Scherzer
Got worser
And Harper
Will scarper
And Wieters
Missed a beat, sir?
The manager who
Delivered the Nats
To the brink
Shouldn’t shoo
When pitchers and bats
Made the stink.