Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
A wildcat did prowl
The wind began to howl
and Oddibe McDowell
belongs in a Bob Dylan song.
.
Jim Siergey is the author and illustrator of the Cubs alternate history If They Did It. You can see more of his illustration work at his website here.
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By Stuart Shea
ARIZONA DIAMONDBACKS
With Mark Reynolds gone,
It won’t be quite as windy
this year at Chase Field
COLORADO ROCKIES
Clutch Car-Go signed,
Willy Taveras signed too–
One step up, one back.
LOS ANGELES DODGERS
An oblique signing,
Middling veteran Jon Garland–
Now an oblique strain.
SAN DIEGO PADRES
It is much tougher
To sneak up on somebody
When they know you’re there.
SAN FRANCISCO GIANTS
As full as lush peonies,
Hosting every bee and fly–
Brian Wilson’s beard.
They called Ernie Banks “Mister Cub”
but Santo could sure be his sub
He bled Cubbie Blue
(They never came through)
For Ronnie, ah, that was the rub
Jim often posts under the pseudonym Norm Knott at LimerWrecks.
By Stuart Shea
Back in the summer the Jints made a trade
To bring in Jose Guillen.
Bad in the clubhouse, can’t play the field
That’s how people see ‘im.
Still it was shocking that he didn’t even
Once in the playoffs appear…
Now that we know someone’s reading his mail
The reason is much more clear.