by James Finn Garner
Don Mattingly’s LA Dodgers,
According to some hot-stove codgers,
Have flouted the unwritten rules
And shown themselves obnoxious tools.
Puig should do as he is told,
Not act like a 22-year-old.
And jumping in the D-Backs’ pool?
Uncool, Tinseltown Tots, uncool.
Dodgers, give heed to the reporters
For your endless list of oughtas.
Obey them when you’re hitting and scoring
And keep the game St. Louis boring.
There’s too much gesticulation
in the field of Dodger nation!
Just sit on your hands,
slight nod to the stands–
That’s quite enough celebration.