by Stephen Jones
Don’t kill the pitchers
Pinstripe offense anemic
Yankees brushed aside
Ol’ Ketchup Sock Does It Again
by James Finn Garner
Transphobic remarks
A predictable mark
On the post-game career of Curt Schilling.
Not out of synch
with how this dolt thinks,
But ESPN always proved willing
To give him a pass,
Jock sniff and kiss ass–
Somewhere else, he’d’ve been canned in a trice.
To call his “free” speech
Is a ridiculous reach,
With hate, fear and regression the price.
Mid-April Brewer Blues
by the Brewer Haiku-er (@brew_haiku)
April 15
Brewers 7, Pirates 4
PNC boos Braun
So he steps up and jacks one
2 homers 2 nite
April 17
Pirates 5, Brewers 0
When the Brewers lose
They do it in a big way
Ain’t no runs tonight
April 18
Pirates 9, Brewers 3
No comeback today
Crew makes a dent in the 4th
McCutch slams door shut
Follow the Brewer Haiku-er on Twitter for updates every day (@brew_haiku).
Colon Ranger
by Michael X. Ferraro
Conjuring his Inner Say Hey Kid,
Bartolo decamps from the mound.
Sprinting so fast he loses his lid,
He covers a whole lot of ground,
And hauls in Galvis’ base-hit bid–
Yet another Colon foe clowned.
For a clip of Colon’s play, click here.
Michael’s hilarious football book Circus Catch is available from Amazon now.
Panda Fan’s Lament
by the Village Elliott
As Giants’ Panda fan since his birth,
Loved the way Pablo played full of mirth–
Ate from both sides of plate,
Now he can’t hit his weight,
Sad he’s unfit to play with full girth.
After the Giants got Panda’s best,
The Red Sox will pay for the rest.
Jints dodged bullet by not
Matching loot Panda got.
Sox fans moan, Giants’ faithful feel blessed.